Now this picking up at the gym business has me stumped. I don’t know about you but the minute my heart rate starts to go up my face turns bright red, I sweat and all round just look disgusting. Let’s face it, generally the only people who look fabulous working out are people in movies. So how you are suppose to attract the right kind of male attention is beyond me but if the Chick mags tell me it’s a go-er , I’m going to give it a crack.
But which gym? Townsville has so many gyms I don’t’ know where to start so on the recommendation of my Sister I pick Genesis Thuringowa. Following her advice I sign up for their new Body for Life program which means a trainer is going to try as hard as they can to minimise my badonk-a-donk butt (best of luck to them really) over the next 12 weeks. I figure 12 weeks give me plenty of time to check out the talent and I don’t look like I joined the gym with the sole purpose of working on my stalking skills.
After meeting with my trainer and getting passed the embarrassing weigh in (I’m so not telling how much I weigh but luckily it was less than a baby whale) and the wonderful “before “ shot (which is not getting put in the paper so don’t ask) I am ready to hit the gym. I don’t know what tipped me off first that this was not going to be the day to perve on hot men, the evil glint in my trainers eye or the way she moved in like a wolf circling a cute little (unfit) bunny! Whatever it was it was clear that exercise and scanning for guys is not a combination I’m going to be able to master.
Turns out my trainer not only managed to make me red faced but makes me omit strange breathing and grunting sounds while exercising. When I say makes me I don’t mean out of sheer strenuousness am I making them but that she is telling me she wants to “hear my breath”. Now I’m not a loud breather so in order to comply I am making these odd noises that are mostly me spitting across the room. Between that and the odd faces I can see myself pulling it’s obvious that no man will look twice at me in this state, except perhaps to check if I require medical assistance. Besides I don’t’ think I have enough air in my lungs to actually say the words “Hi, I’m Candice… are you single?”.
But at the end, even though I probably scared people away, my trainer smiles and tells me I’ll do great at the group fitness training tomorrow which makes me feel a bit better. Although I think she was referring to my workout, maybe there will be some hotties in the group and surely this way I won’t have my trainer with me so I might get to look a little ridiculous without the noises and be able to ask them about what they think of meeting girls at the gym.
But you see this is my downfall – I have no idea that group training for Body for Life is not a light aerobics class instead I am subjected to hard-core, sweat producing, stomach churning spin class suited only to the super fit not the cake eating, cocktail drinking, likes to have a Nana nap at 3pm on a Sunday, kind of girl I am. For those of you who have never done a spin class will have no idea what I’m talking about and probably think I’m a total sook right now but trust me when I tell you that spinning is not for the feint hearted.
So I guess this is where the women’s mag’s really nailed it - Nothing says “hot” like having to be revived by your trainer and sent of to the hospital. Maybe after a few weeks when my fitness improves and my fainting reflex is a little less sensitive I will have better luck. If not well, there is always the silver lining that my butt will be a little less visible from space.
If you don’t want to do things the hard way like me but like the idea of getting fit and finding love, Donna from Twin Cities Fitness has come up with a fabulous concept called “Flirting with Fitness”. Designed for singles only, you can pop along and meet singles while working on those love handles! Donna has arranged the sessions to give singles a place to meet away from bars and nightclubs, and without the need for a hard drive. Registration closes the 13th October so pop on in and see Donna or give her a call about the next one – don’t be shy now, you were the one’s complaining that there was no place to meet people after all.
But which gym? Townsville has so many gyms I don’t’ know where to start so on the recommendation of my Sister I pick Genesis Thuringowa. Following her advice I sign up for their new Body for Life program which means a trainer is going to try as hard as they can to minimise my badonk-a-donk butt (best of luck to them really) over the next 12 weeks. I figure 12 weeks give me plenty of time to check out the talent and I don’t look like I joined the gym with the sole purpose of working on my stalking skills.
After meeting with my trainer and getting passed the embarrassing weigh in (I’m so not telling how much I weigh but luckily it was less than a baby whale) and the wonderful “before “ shot (which is not getting put in the paper so don’t ask) I am ready to hit the gym. I don’t know what tipped me off first that this was not going to be the day to perve on hot men, the evil glint in my trainers eye or the way she moved in like a wolf circling a cute little (unfit) bunny! Whatever it was it was clear that exercise and scanning for guys is not a combination I’m going to be able to master.
Turns out my trainer not only managed to make me red faced but makes me omit strange breathing and grunting sounds while exercising. When I say makes me I don’t mean out of sheer strenuousness am I making them but that she is telling me she wants to “hear my breath”. Now I’m not a loud breather so in order to comply I am making these odd noises that are mostly me spitting across the room. Between that and the odd faces I can see myself pulling it’s obvious that no man will look twice at me in this state, except perhaps to check if I require medical assistance. Besides I don’t’ think I have enough air in my lungs to actually say the words “Hi, I’m Candice… are you single?”.
But at the end, even though I probably scared people away, my trainer smiles and tells me I’ll do great at the group fitness training tomorrow which makes me feel a bit better. Although I think she was referring to my workout, maybe there will be some hotties in the group and surely this way I won’t have my trainer with me so I might get to look a little ridiculous without the noises and be able to ask them about what they think of meeting girls at the gym.
But you see this is my downfall – I have no idea that group training for Body for Life is not a light aerobics class instead I am subjected to hard-core, sweat producing, stomach churning spin class suited only to the super fit not the cake eating, cocktail drinking, likes to have a Nana nap at 3pm on a Sunday, kind of girl I am. For those of you who have never done a spin class will have no idea what I’m talking about and probably think I’m a total sook right now but trust me when I tell you that spinning is not for the feint hearted.
So I guess this is where the women’s mag’s really nailed it - Nothing says “hot” like having to be revived by your trainer and sent of to the hospital. Maybe after a few weeks when my fitness improves and my fainting reflex is a little less sensitive I will have better luck. If not well, there is always the silver lining that my butt will be a little less visible from space.
If you don’t want to do things the hard way like me but like the idea of getting fit and finding love, Donna from Twin Cities Fitness has come up with a fabulous concept called “Flirting with Fitness”. Designed for singles only, you can pop along and meet singles while working on those love handles! Donna has arranged the sessions to give singles a place to meet away from bars and nightclubs, and without the need for a hard drive. Registration closes the 13th October so pop on in and see Donna or give her a call about the next one – don’t be shy now, you were the one’s complaining that there was no place to meet people after all.
No comments:
Post a Comment